someone lock me up, please

cagey- the word spectators and competitors use for those athletes who have been around the sport for some time and still are a threat to win a race or two at any given time. i'm not sure if that is the oxford definition or if there are alternate (e.g. correct) spellings- no matter as i've done a pretty good job thus far disregarding oxford and alternate spellings... the fact is, i've always thought of "cagey" as two parts: 1. putting the old veteran runner in some sort of confinement unit and feeding them splits through the bars at the fancy of a volunteer official as the veteran toils with a mass of springy youth anxious to take the scalp of an athlete they read about in back issues of track and field news.

cagey vets aside, i'm always impressed with the elastic qualities of young athletes. these wet noodles can fly thousands of miles across a variety of perfectly good timezones and arrive on the west coast ready for action. i can spot them tumbling out of their rental vans, 20 in an 8 seater, and unfold themselves to be instantaneously rejuvinated by the california sunshine and glimmering start lists. they see the vets on the start lists and drool- it is a prime chance for making a name for themselves amongst their peers. (really good college athletes could care less who is in the field because the goal is still the same: win. this is where the very good cagey vets start. most older athletes are just vets- the cagey ones long to be in the A section of races and will not allow themselves to suffer through a comeback or finish a career in anything other than a premier event. they've got too many other things to do in life by now if they want to be as serious as they once were without the payout. i can't blame them wanting a little love at the races, they've earned it.). still, the noodle thinks "if i have the greatest day of my life, i can beat (name, criteria following) who finished (any place in a final) at the (your favorite major) championships in (some year circa 1999 or earlier- because the 90's sound OLD). what MOST noodles don't realize is they are in much better shape than they think. the noodles have been slapping around the track with just as much flair and guts as anyone and are probably able to deal with the bang-bang of racing with more vigor than those cagey vets. but that's where the trouble starts.

as the race goes off (and it will tomorrow night at 8:15pm for me), the noodles will crowd the B section- my race, but in no way to i consider myself a cagey vet...yet- and slide in and out of each other for the greater part of 2 miles. they will notice the jersey of a rival competitor and get fired up enough to make a brash and possibly grande move, usually ending in disaster, just to sneak a peak at the lead or chase pack. i know this because i've been the noodle and in most races still am. while the noodle is weaving in and out of traffic with apparent ease and envied spunk, the vet follows, looming behind bars.

cagey vet definition 2:

as the 3rd mile in the 5k or final 1/3 of the race in any event begins to take shape, the vet has been gathering information throughout the race. the cage, as you might guess, is a little irritating to carry but a blessing when some young noodle (might as well stay with the phrase) tries to inadvertantly bump the racer in the traveling brig. the vet, knowing the protective qualities of their custom crossbar hotel, continues to race a predetermined plan without the distractions of jostling and rear pack pace fluctuations. finally at the 2/3 mark, the key is inserted and the door swings wide setting the vet loose in the wilds of the race. as we all know, cagey distance vets like carbs, so the noodles get swallowed up like a post race six pack as the vet travels through the gaggle of youngsters poised to close quickly and gather another solid finish. the noodles stagger in wondering how their race could have been better (hint: patience) and remark on the guile of an athlete who graduated college when they were a sophmore in high school.

as it appears, cagey is a pretty good thing to be known for in a race. additionally, becoming a veteran racer is not such a hard title to grab. it's the combonation of "cagey veteran" that is a struggle to obtain because as racers mature, each newly knighted vet must search their aged memories and remember where they put the keys.